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 Songs I write

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LightningSpike
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PostSubject: Songs I write   Sun Feb 05, 2012 5:52 pm

Well, I'm the singer/main lyricist for my band, so I figure I'll post lyrics I've written here.

I'll update with more when I write them

Spoiler:
 


Last edited by LightningSpike on Sun Feb 05, 2012 9:31 pm; edited 2 times in total
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ZXoftheDarkness
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PostSubject: Re: Songs I write   Sun Feb 05, 2012 5:53 pm

Should be interesting to look at, I've been writing for as long as I've been interested, so I'll be happy to point things out for you.

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thomas

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PostSubject: Re: Songs I write   Sun Feb 05, 2012 5:54 pm

What kinda band?

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PostSubject: Re: Songs I write   Sun Feb 05, 2012 6:05 pm

thomas wrote:
What kinda band?
Mainly punk, but I want to experiment with other genres too.
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PostSubject: Re: Songs I write   Sun Feb 05, 2012 6:06 pm

Include violin and piano in your songs XD

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PostSubject: Re: Songs I write   Sun Feb 05, 2012 6:07 pm

And some really heavy beats Very Happy

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PostSubject: Re: Songs I write   Sun Feb 05, 2012 6:08 pm

If I included any strings at this point it would probably be viola since I own one and can already play it, but I've already thought about adding piano, and I probably will to at least some songs. I've also considered making some songs that are like electro-punk fusion or something, I'm just trying to think of how to do it without having it sound like shit.
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PostSubject: Re: Songs I write   Sun Feb 05, 2012 7:45 pm

Piano makes anything listenable, just my point of view tbh xD

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PostSubject: Re: Songs I write   Sun Feb 05, 2012 7:59 pm

I think strings do the same thing. Just depends though.

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PostSubject: Re: Songs I write   Sun Feb 05, 2012 8:02 pm

Violin and Piano are my two favorite instruments

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PostSubject: Re: Songs I write   Sun Feb 05, 2012 8:02 pm

I like electronics the most. Then strings. Nothing specific for either one of those, just in general.

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PostSubject: Re: Songs I write   Sun Feb 05, 2012 8:03 pm

When mixed they are amazing, I'd link you to a band, but you hate screaming XD

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PostSubject: Re: Songs I write   Sun Feb 05, 2012 9:30 pm

updated post with lyrics

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PostSubject: Re: Songs I write   Sun Feb 05, 2012 9:34 pm

I'll read your lyrics over and give criticism / ways to improve if there are any soon

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LightningSpike
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PostSubject: Re: Songs I write   Mon Feb 06, 2012 9:34 pm

Wrote a new song, the lyrics are heavily inspired by Radiohead, so I hope to make the track sound like something off OK Computer.

Spoiler:
 

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PostSubject: Re: Songs I write   Mon Feb 06, 2012 10:26 pm

Saying its to protect the kids
But it's killing the kids


Moments like these throughout your songs make them slightly repetitive.
But other than that your new song is a good song.

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PostSubject: Re: Songs I write   Mon Feb 06, 2012 10:31 pm

At some points (like in the example you posted) the repetition is there on purpose. But most of the time it's there because I just couldn't think of anything better to say at that point, because most of these songs were written in one go without any editing.

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PostSubject: Re: Songs I write   Mon Feb 06, 2012 10:33 pm

LightningSpike wrote:
At some points (like in the example you posted) the repetition is there on purpose. But most of the time it's there because I just couldn't think of anything better to say at that point, because most of these songs were written in one go without any editing.

Original
Saying its to protect the kids
But it's killing the kids

Correction 1

Saying it's to protect the kids
But it's shutting their lids

Correction 2

Saying it's to protect the youth
But it's all just uncouth

There are several options that you could do, sometimes repetition while intentional just makes it seem like your songs lack depth. Symbolism is a brilliant writing tool for songs, it can make or break a song sometimes.

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PostSubject: Re: Songs I write   Mon Feb 06, 2012 10:50 pm

I like correction 2, and will consider it. Thanks for the advice and help.

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PostSubject: Re: Songs I write   Mon Feb 06, 2012 11:41 pm

LightningSpike wrote:
I like correction 2, and will consider it. Thanks for the advice and help.

It's no prob, I write songs a lot so I'm pretty used to reviewing work over and over again.

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